Making the Decision to Adopt: Part 1

The path to choosing adoption is different for everyone. Here, some of our forum members share what led them to making the decision to adopt. Scroll down for the link to part two of this discussion. When we decided to adopt it was a very spontaneous decision. During a frustrating conversation with my mother about my sister’s poor parenting choices, I blurted out “Don’t call me about her behavior again...

Life As A Foster Child

I recently asked a dear friend of mine to talk about her experience as a foster child. As you read her story, think about ways in which the system could improve so as to provide stability, security, and loving emotional support throughout a child’s youth. Should the goal be reunification, or should it be, for example, a “least restrictive environment” focused upon the child’s psychological needs,...

National Foster Care Month

Did you know that May is National Foster Care Month? Started in 1988, National Foster Care Month aims to recognise the efforts of foster parents across our nation and put focus on the needs of foster children, especially those about to age out of the system. With approximately 12 million foster care alumni and 424,000 children currently in foster care waiting for families, it is hard to ignore the impact of child abuse and...

Alabama Adoption

When Air Force family Henry and Stephanie Hayes started foster care for children four years ago, they weren’t necessarily looking to adopt. They’re the parents of two birth children and had opened their Montgomery home to 11 foster children over the years. They were content. That is, until they met baby Jaylan. “He is medically fragile and when we learned that he would not be able to return to his birth...

In Praise Of Foster Parents

The weekend before Christmas has become the time when we host our annual get together with my children’s former foster parents.  I’ve posted about them before but for those of you that are new to our blog or adoption forum, let me backtrack a bit. When we adopted our children, they were 5, 8 and 11 and had been in the foster system for 4 years, the last three being spent with foster parents Pat & Bill.  Over...

Families Change: A Book for Children Experiencing ...

All families change over time. Sometimes a baby is born, or a grown-up gets married. And sometimes a child gets placed in foster care. Children need to know that when this happens, it’s not their fault. When a child gets adopted they need to understand that they can remember and value their birth family and love their new family, too. Straightforward words and full-color illustrations offer hope and support for...

Keeping In Touch With Former Foster Parents

I’ve previously blogged about the great relationship we have with our children’s former foster parents. Since we finalized our adoption (2003), we’ve made it a point to see them once or twice a year. My kid’s had other foster parents, besides Pat & Bill, but they lived with this particular couple for the last three (of the four) years. In the beginning I felt it was important for my children to...

The Traumatized Adoptee

The Traumatized Adoptee From their site: Parents who adopt children from agencies like social services often find themselves wondering what they have gotten themselves into and don’t know where to turn for help. It can feel like navigating a field of barbed wire. This site aims to provide a virtual support group for this community–foster parents, adoptive parents, older kids who have been fostered or adopted,...

Gay Couple Allowed To Adopt In Florida

As someone who has lived in Florida for the past six years, I am thrilled with the judge’s decision. There aren’t to many state laws left barring gay people from adopting and the last few done away with. Florida is the only state with an outright ban on gay adoption. Arkansas voters last month approved a measure similar to a law in Utah that bans any unmarried straight or gay couples from adopting or fostering...

15 Questions To Ask Before Adopting Older Children

Adopting older children is not for the faint of heart. I have three children that we adopted at the ages of 5, 8 & 11 and if anything, it’s never boring. Linny, the co-administrator at our adoption forums compiled a list of honest, informative questions to ask before you adopt an older child through the foster care system. “My dh and I have adopted seven children to date. However, our ‘forever...