Adoption Support at Forever Parents

Adoption Profile Tips

What makes a good adoption profile?
What information should be included?
How can I make mine stand out?

I asked our adoption forums members what advice they would give someone who was creating a profile and here’s what some of them said.

*** I had to get friends to help me to write my letter and put together my profile. They were better able to communicate my warmth. I was too close to the situation. They were able to see the pictures through outside eyes — I saw the circumstances around the picture that might not have been communicated through the picture itself. We included pictures of our dogs, which our son’s bmom just loved. She wanted to see that we were a warm and loving couple. Seeing us walking our dogs helped with this.

*** I learned that you don’t want to include tons and tons of pictures on one page. Just a couple of good ones and write from your heart and be descriptive. I also learned from doing ours that pet photos are important. One PBM chose us who had a dog like ours growing up and liked that we spoiled her. Unfortunately her fees were too high for us. Do it in a 8 x 10 book or portfolio type book from somewhere like Kinkos b/c 12 x 12 copies are expensive and for me was impossible to find somewhere to copy. Don’t try to do it all in one day. Decide what you want to share in your portfolio and write it down either together or separate and then go back and edit. Take your time sharing who you are. You may have to write a bio for your homestudy but this is you in a nutshell and what they potential birth parents will see. Some attorneys will not want a large profile book but just several pages so also make a condensed version to send to those who may request it so you aren’t trying to do that in a hurry last minute. When writing your letter try to keep it a page but don’t worry if you can’t. Ours was almost two pages and our son’s birthmother was moved and very certain after reading it we were the ones meant to adopt him.

*** One big thing - no matter what your agency says - don’t call them birthparents, especially before placement. It is considered subtly coercive and even derogatory by some. Instead, I recommend simply, “Hello” or Dear Expectant Parents.” It is highly respectful and sets you apart from the others in the stack right off the bat. Be yourselves. Show yourselves. Help the readers envision what a child’s life with you would be like. Help them see what their life with you will be like (if you are considering open adoption).

*** All I learned was through doing and redoing and doing it again…plus reading and seeing other people’s profiles and letters. I strove to be “myself” and represent us positively yet honestly. In our first profile I included too many pictures and it included too much personal info. I shaved that down quite a bit and redid my letter to sound less desperate. After my fourth attempt at a profile, I finally had one I was really proud of. This was after we adopted our first and were awaiting our second child. The second agency limited us to four pages of pictures and a one page letter. It really helped to keep it simple. I think addressing the letter to “expectant parent” was a very good tip (may have learned that on Forever Parents) and my introduction was way better than my first attempt.

Anybody else have any tips to include? Post them in the comment section and I’ll add them to this post.

Related Posts:

1. 10 Adoption Profile Tips
2. Helpful Tips For Choosing An Adoption Agency
3. Adoption Profiles
4. Adoption Life Books
5. Adoption Lifebook Supplies